Clik here to view.
Dating After Divorce: Preparing the Kids
The longer I work as a neutral child specialist, the more important I realize it is to help divorcing parents have meaningful conversations about the possibility that one or both of them will enter...
View ArticleClik here to view.
The Art of Present Moment Parenting
I have known Tina Feigal for about eight years, and over that time have talked with her several times about the unique work she does coaching parents to become effective while dealing with challenging...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Peace is Possible
Peace is possible though we are surrounded by conflict. In the recent words of former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright, “The world is a mess.” Messiness occurs when people are unable or...
View ArticleClik here to view.
The Elephant in the Room
If a ring is a sign of marriage, should there be a sign for divorce? How do you handle simple social situations and interactions regarding your divorce? Do you come right out and tell people you are...
View ArticleClik here to view.
The Wisdom of the Child Specialist
I am working on a case in which the parties have elected to use the services of a neutral child specialist to evaluate the parties’ two children (9 and 12), to communicate her findings, and to help...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Through the Eyes of a Child
Even under the best of circumstances, divorce can be a traumatic experience for a child. It was a huge insight for me when I first realized that young children’s stories about giants are really about...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Ex-Spouses Who Care
In the past few months, I have seen a number of people in my social network share this letter. It is a wonderfully written letter from an ex-Wife to her husband’s new girlfriend. Instead of the...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Keeping Children out of the Middle
A core value of Collaborative Team Practice is keeping children at the center and out of the middle. But what does this mean? Why this is distinction important? It is because divorcing parents are...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Investing in your Child’s Future: Divorce Process Matters
Having recently become a grandparent for the first time, I am pondering the future with renewed urgency that my granddaughter’s legacy be one of hope and abundance. As she grows, there is no way to...
View ArticleThe Fallacy of Fifty-Fifty Parenting
One of the most common requests we hear from divorcing clients with children, is that they want fifty-fifty parenting. What this does is collapse quantity with quality. The two are not synonymous. When...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Giving Children Hope
Today I met with two very attuned and caring parents who have, after many efforts at repair, made the decision to end their marriage. Topmost on their list of concerns was the impact their divorce...
View ArticleClik here to view.
After the Divorce
On lists of life stressors, divorce is usually ranked among the top two or three most emotionally challenging events. The process itself is experienced as highly stressful by many people, and from what...
View ArticleThe Risk of Making Assumptions
0In his book The Four Agreements, author Don Miguel Ruiz articulates four principles which, when regularly practiced, will enable people to avoid conflict and live a peaceful life. The agreements one...
View ArticleChildren in High Conflict Families
We live in a bell curve world. By that I simply mean that all manner of traits and characteristics can be viewed as occurring in a distribution throughout society that clumps more numbers in the...
View ArticleClik here to view.
The Third Agreement
In his book about how to avoid human conflict, Don Miguel Ruiz suggests these four agreements that a person makes with himself or herself: 1. I will be impeccable with my word. 2. I will not...
View ArticleThe Second Agreement
Some time ago I wrote about The Four Agreements from a book by the same name by Don Miguel Ruiz. Ruiz believes we can stay out of conflict if each person makes the following agreements with him or...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Helping Children Cope with the Stress of Divorce
Your divorce probably has you feeling like everything is beyond your control. Now imagine the lack of control your children are feeling. Yesterday they had a family with two parents living under the...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Twin Cities Fun on a Single Parent Budget
Looking for some Twin Cities fun on a budget? Going from a duel income to a single income is not only difficult, but can bring on many emotions, especially if it leaves you feeling inadequate with...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Vacations and Divorce
Vacations are a common part of family life. Some families like to camp or take close-to-home trips to a local hotel or amusement location. Other families have vacation traditions, such as family...
View ArticleClik here to view.
New Significant Others After a Divorce
An amicable separation and divorce can sometimes become strained when new relationships start. New significant others often cause new emotional reactions that can subsequently impact parenting. In...
View Article
